Why don't the Japanese think of their life outside the collective, the Americans are tolerant, and the French are too independent? It's all about education.
1 Raising Children in Japan
Japanese children go through three stages of formation: god - slave - equal. After five years of complete "relaxation" and almost absolute permissiveness (within reason, of course), it is probably not easy to pull yourself together and begin to clearly follow the general system of rules and restrictions.
Only at the age of 15 do they begin to treat the child as an equal, wanting to see him as a disciplined and law-abiding citizen. Reading lectures, shouting or corporal punishment - Japanese children are deprived of all these non-pedagogical "charms". The most terrible punishment is “playing in silence” - adults simply stop communicating with the baby for a while. Adults do not try to dominate children, do not seek to show their power and strength, maybe that is why throughout their lives the Japanese idolize their parents (especially mothers) and try not to give them trouble.
In the 50s of the last century, the revolutionary book "Teaching Talents" was published in Japan. At the suggestion of its author, Masaru Ibuka, the country for the first time began to talk about the need for early development of children. Proceeding from the fact that in the first three years of life the child's personality is formed, parents are obliged to create all conditions for the realization of his abilities. A sense of community is what really matters to all Japanese people, without exception. Therefore, it is not surprising that parents preach one simple truth: "Alone it is easy to get lost in the intricacies of life."
However, the disadvantage of the Japanese approach to education is obvious: life according to the principle "like everyone else" and group consciousness do not give personal qualities a single chance.
2.Parenting of children in France
The main feature of the French upbringing system is early socialization and independence of children. Many French women can only dream of many years of maternity leave, as they have to go to work early. French nurseries are ready to accept babies at the age of 2-3 months. Despite the care and love, parents are able to say: "No!" Adults demand discipline and unquestioning obedience from children. Just one glance is enough for the baby to "bounce back". Little Frenchmen always say "magic words", quietly waiting for dinner or primly swarming in the sandpit while their mothers chat with their friends. Parents do not pay attention to minor pranks, but for major offenses they are punished with a “ruble”: they are deprived of entertainment, gifts or sweets.
An excellent exploration of the French parenting system is presented in Pamela Druckerman's book French Children Don't Spit Food. Indeed, European children are very obedient, calm and independent. Problems arise when parents are overly interested in their own personal lives - then alienation cannot be avoided.
3.Parenting of children in Italy
Children in Italy are not just adored. They are idolized! And not only their own parents and numerous relatives, but also completely strangers. Saying something to someone else's child, pinching him on the cheeks or "scaring a goat" is considered in the order of things.
A child can go to kindergarten at the age of three, until that time he will most likely be under the "vigilant" control of a grandmother or grandfather, aunt or uncle, cousin, niece and all other relatives. Children begin to “show” children very early - they are taken to concerts, to restaurants, to weddings. Making a remark, let alone a restraining slap, is unacceptable behavior for a parent. If you constantly pull up a child, then he will grow up notorious, - so Italian parents think. Such a strategy, at times, ends in shame: absolute permissiveness leads to the fact that many children have no idea about the generally accepted rules of decency.
4.Parenting of Children in India
Indians start raising their children almost from the moment they are born. The main quality that parents want to see in their children is kindness. By personal example, they teach children to be patient with others, to restrain their emotions in any situations. Adults try to hide a bad mood or fatigue from children. The whole life of a child should be permeated with good thoughts: the warning "do not crush the ant and do not throw stones at the birds" eventually transforms into "do not offend the weak and respect the elders." A child is worthy of the highest praise not when he became “better than another”, but when he became “better than himself”. At the same time, Indian parents are very conservative, for example, they flatly refuse to accept the introduction of current modern disciplines into the school curriculum.
Raising children has always been considered in India not as a prerogative of the state, but was left to the mercy of parents who could raise a child in accordance with their beliefs, including religious ones.
5.Parenting America's Children
Americans have qualities that easily betray them “in the crowd”: inner freedom peacefully coexists with political correctness and strict adherence to the letter of the law. The desire to be closer to the child, to delve into problems and be interested in success are the most important aspects of the life of American parents. It is no coincidence that at any kindergarten matinee or school football game, you can see a large number of dads and mothers with video cameras in their hands. The older generation does not take part in raising grandchildren, but mothers, if possible, prefer taking care of the family to work.
From an early age, a child is taught tolerance, so it is quite easy for special children to adapt to a team, for example. A clear advantage of the American parenting system is informality and a desire to focus on practical knowledge.
Oppression, which is negatively perceived in many countries, is called "obedience to the law" in America: it is considered absolutely natural to denounce those who have broken the law. Corporal punishment is condemned by society, and if a child complains about his parents and presents "evidence" (bruises or abrasions), then the actions of adults can be regarded as illegal with all the ensuing consequences. As a punishment, many parents use the popular “time-out” technique, in which the child is asked to sit silently and reflect on his behavior.